The Chameleon

Hiya, I’m Poss, and welcome back to my Confessions from a COO series, where I share insights from over 20 years working in digital and data driven organisations.

Over the last month I’ve been mixing it up. Facilitating coaching sessions, collaborating on funding proposals, trying to start up a new venture of my own… The contrast in the conversation has been significant. Not just in content, but in tone, and even body language. Whilst it's been hard work, this isn’t particularly unusual, especially for a senior leader, and to be honest I’ve always been quite good at “it”, so I didn’t really think much of it.

But then I came across a wonderful TED talk by Chandra Arthur which got me thinking. Perhaps I’m only good at it because I have spent my life adjusting my behaviour to simply fit in. The argument here is that as a person of mixed heritage, I don’t have a “normal”, so I’m continuously adjusting my persona with different people to try and fit in.

I’m a classic chameleon!

No, not the slow-moving lizard, but:

a person who changes their opinions or behaviour according to the situation.

So naturally, I started to think about being a chameleon and code-switching. Is my ability to quickly “code-switch” a superpower? Or, am I going to burn myself out? And is this a crucial skill for a COO?

Why code-switching matters

A COO operates at the intersection of strategy and execution. One day you might be engaging with frontline staff, the next with external partners or senior executives. Each group has distinct priorities and communication styles. Here’s why code-switching is so valuable:

• bridging the gap – It enables connection with different stakeholders. Whether simplifying technical language for non-specialists or engaging in detailed discussions with experts, adaptability builds trust and understanding.

• gaining alignment – A COO must ensure everyone is working towards the same goals. Speaking their language fosters clarity and unity.

• fostering inclusion – Tailoring communication ensures that everyone feels heard and valued, strengthening workplace culture.

  
  

But then why is it tiring and why does it feel so hard?

While beneficial, code-switching can create issues. Over the years, I’ve unconsciously managed to use it to my advantage, but now i’m aware of it, I think there are some unintended consequences:

• Losing authenticity – Constantly shifting communication styles can create a sense of detachment from your true self. Overuse may come across as insincere or misleading. I proudly say “I have strong opinions, loosely held”, which plays to this issue, and can sometimes undermine my credibility.

• Experiencing fatigue – Continual adjustment throughout the day can be mentally and emotionally draining. I think this is amplified with personal relationships too.

• Blurring boundaries – Efforts to connect with different audiences may unintentionally cross professional lines or send mixed messages about leadership responsibilities.

• Appearing inconsistent – If messages vary too much across interactions, it can lead to confusion or mistrust within the team

Striking the right balance

Awareness of my code-switching is relatively new to me, so writing about it here has helped, and like any good summary, here are three recommendations for you (but mostly for me):

1. Be clear on my core values and try to maintain them. Adjusting tone and language is one thing, but I’ll try and stay true to your principles. Consistency in values reinforces credibility and gives

2. Being transparent – Sometimes, acknowledging the shift with my colleagues should help. Transparency fosters trust.

3. Recognising limits – Be mindful of when code-switching is becoming mentally or physically exhausting. Taking breaks can help maintain balance.

Code-switching is more than just useful, it’s essential for a modern leader. However, like any skill, it requires practice, self-awareness, and balance.

What do you think? Have you experienced code-switching at work?

Better yet, have you worked with me and have an anecdote to share about Poss, the code-switching chameleon?!

First written on 23 March 2025